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More On The Existence of the Mythical “Geek Girl”

Last month I questioned the existence of the “Geek Girl” as an actual being instead of myth (yes I was being tongue in cheek) and I was amazed at the responses that came in.

To date they number 87, which is far and away the most I’ve ever seen on the blog — and they were enlightening on many levels.

In fact, I think I may have found my answer as to why it was that Geek Boys sometimes seem to (very strongly) question the existence or veracity of Geek babes online and off. But I figured I’d check.

Reading the comments, many of the male comments mentioned things like shyness or a feeling of not belonging being a large part of their geek existence, whether currently or growing up. Questions of acceptance, the ability to be expressed freely and feeling comfortable with their geekiness also came up.

On the flipside, you have a bevy of female geeks being very “expressed” both online and off. I realized that my flirtatious nature and outgoing personality are often offered as reasons I’m not a geek girl.

If flirt online and feel comfortable expressing myself at geek functions like SDCC, I’m not really a geek?

Personally, I feel lucky to have found a place to feel comfortable with my geekitude. I can’t imagine someone denying my right to that.

So, I figured I’d offer it as a theory and see what other people think…


  1. One thing I have noticed is that geek girls are a lot more likely to be “openly geek” especially when still in their teen years – an age when guy geeks can still be beat up by non-geeks. I also don’t know about self-identifying as a geek because it implies there’s something wrong with you.

  2. Hmmm… So the fact that I’m a)Old b)Attractive and fairly Personable and/or c) Not a computer/video gamer means I’m not a geek?

    Really? I started programming in H.S. when TRS80’s were state of the art, I wrote machine level code in College b/c Basic didn’t do what our Chem Department needed, I managed an EB Games for years, and then I spent nearly a decade as a Cisco NOC/WAN manager for commercial ISPs.

    I’m also a theatre geek (lights/set design & construction), a film geek, a book geek, a sci-fi/fantasy geek, a horror geek, a music geek, a con geek, etc. Plus I’m better at electronics repair and configuration than most men I know, I live on my computer/the web, and I still want my DNA sequenced so it can be inked around my arm in a sleeve.

    But my age or my personal style (rivet/goth, mohawk sporting freak), or the fact that video games make me nauseous means I’m not a geek?

    Nope, sorry, that’s totally wrong. And guys – please learn to behave yourselves at cons; my light up mohawk and corset do not mean you can grab me or I want to take a picture with your girlfriend. I’m there to enjoy myself as a geek, to play with the new toys, browse the new Comics, and see the latest tech just like you are. Only I don’t like baggy t-shirts and jeans or sneakers. Just saying…


    Another Geek Girl

  3. :) I think you definetly qualify as a GEEK GIRL the flirtiness is part of who you are and shouldn’t detract from it. The whole debate is interesting to me since I never knew about other geek girls till I joined twitter:)

    I can’t speak for Geek Guys but though I haven’t felt unwelcome at a con there is definetly a hesitation on their part to interact. And now with the large hollywood presence at SDCC lots more women attending so there is bound to be some discussion of tru geek/vs poser geek :)

  4. remember when they ran the “geek confessions” day. where you talked about something that you did or didn’t like that were contrary to the geek culture. I think being a little more social is a like that. If being outgoing makes you not a geek, then hating star wars or video games would also qualify you as not a geek too. Which is silly if you’re ignoring a plethora of other personality traits and preferences.
    I think you’re right about it being a reason a lot of people deny geekhood to outgoing people. I”m just explaining why i think it’s a silly reason.

  5. re: “flirtatious nature and outgoing personality are often offered as reasons I’m not a geek”

    This comes down to the age-old and non-gender specific taxonomy of “geeks” and “nerds”. I’ve never found a definition that fit, but I always think of the “geeks” as the evangelists for whatever type of geekdom we’re talking about, while “nerds” are the introverted ones who actually are so hardcore that even the thought of interacting with someone outside of their comfort level is to be avoided at all costs.

    Both have skills, and the difference being essentially where they fall on the introvert/extrovert scale.

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